Tag Archives: Life change

Life

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LIFE

Contemplate, self evaluate, make choices, weigh consequences, work hard, be kind to yourself and others, appreciate nature and all its gifts, take responsibility for your actions, respect others opinions, and love-love-love.

Create your life, Create your loves, Be who you really are. There is only one YOU.    May your New Year be filled with……… Life.

 

Some great quotes for the New Year:

“In the end, it’s not going to matter how many breaths you took, but how man moments took your breath away.” ― Shing Xiong

“You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.” ― Mae West

“To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people exist, that is all.” ― Oscar Wilde

“Life isn’t about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.” ― George Bernard Shaw

“How wonderful it is that nobody need wait a single moment before starting to improve the world.” ― Anne Frank

“Where there is love there is life.” ― Mahatma Gandhi

Enough said…

Veronica Crystal Young     -40s Goddess      www.tvartscapes.com

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Courage

 This 4th of July holds a special significance for me. We all know what courage and resolve our forefathers needed to forge a new world order.   This year I have seen courage in some close friends and family, and I, too, have had to muster up a healthy dose. 

Courage. It’s not easy.
  
In this world where technology is increasingly replacing human connection, where jobs are sparse and tempers are high, and where psychological and physical abuse continues to create self-doubt, pain, and fear, Courage is necessary. 

*Necessary to really face ourselves, our faults and shortcomings. To be daring and place ourselves out in the world; vulnerable to hurt, failure, or fear of the unknown, or fear of repeating the past.
*Necessary to express who we really are.
*Necessary to be there for others in hard times.
*Necessary to speak up for our truths and our opinions. To have a voice and to know we count. Remembering that every person matters and is entitled to their opinion or truth, and no one is more important than another.

Courage is the nerve to speak up and act on our dreams, or tell our truths even in the face of all our fears.  Fear of not being accepted, being rejected, failing…I’m sure you can fill in whatever fear it is that keeps you from being all you can be; speaking your truth or living your life fully.  

It’s not easy.  My last post was about being open.  Being courageous is going one more step and having the guts to place yourself in situations that are hard and that have scary consequences, at least “perceived” scary consequences.   And we tend to be swayed by our expectation of those scary consequences.  But here’s the deal….  

Remember that the past does not equal the future, and NOW is the only true time. If we can remember this in every circumstance, and have faith that the universal Mother/Father/God will present what is best and next for us on this road called Life, then we will always have Courage. Our job then becomes the ability to see the path presented and find the choices that are true to who we are and who we want to be.  Trust your intuition on that path. It is the breathe of the Universe.

So this 4th of July, remember courage. Have the courage to speak up and have your voice heard. The courage to face a difficult task or help a friend or family member with a hard choice or situation. The courage to be vulnerable in the world. The courage to be 100% who you really are and find peace, happiness, freedom……..and love.  Your heart will know, trust it.  I do.  It is the greatest gift to ourselves we can give.

Live life, People!  With Love…….. and with COURAGE.

Veronica Crystal Young     -40s Goddess

www.tvartscapes.com       

 

Integrity

Ok, so it was time to re-evaluate a few priorities again.  Yes. It’s a constant struggle, this thing called life.  Always encountering situations where we can continue to create who we are.

Sometimes on this journey, we encounter situations that test our integrity.   What do we believe, who are we, what do we want to project.  Do we compromise what we know is right even just for a little while because, well, we just “need to?” Do we have something to prove or does our mind go a mile a minute rationalizing the situation? We women are good at that. Do we take care of ourselves or someone else at the cost of our own integrity?  Do we have something we did that we are not proud of and that we beat ourselves up for?

Here’s a news flash.  Everyone does.  Cut your self a break!  As women, we evaluate, questions, evaluate again, dissect a situation to death! Why this, why that, what did I do to bring this on, and even “What was I thinking!”

All we have to remember, at any time, in any situation, is who we are and what we want to be is defined by our actions.  That really is it.  And if we stumble, if we fall, if we experience a “What the hell did I do” moment, it’s ok.  Make amends and apologies if it’s needed, and forgive yourself….for being human, having a lapse in judgement or for losing yourself for the moment, and move on with your fantastic, wonderful life. Because it is! Believe that too, and if you don’t, well that’s another subject all together.  “What do you need to be happy.”

Integrity.  It is what we believe and how we act based on those beliefs.  Make no mistake.  Actions speak louder than words and if you are not acting in alignment with your beliefs or words, you might need to evaluate what you really do believe, or who you really are.  And people, that can be a painful realization sometimes.  But not one that can’t be changed. That’s what life is all about, the journey…constant change….evaluation of self, connection and Love …always love.   At least that is what this writer believes.  Besides, How boring would life be without challenges, change and growth?

So as I sit by the pool in beautiful Palm Springs, (yes, I have to brag) I am grateful for everything and everyone in my life.  My family and friends fill me with love and I am blessed for it.  My work (All of the various hats I wear) fulfills me. My work relationships can be challenging, but I would have it no other way for it helps me grow. And I thank mother/father/god for my life, my experiences and the lessons that move me closer to oneness, for truly, we are all one.  Blessed be,,…

GO AND GET IT!  Whatever it is!

Veronica Crystal Young                 www.tvartscapes.com

Hope

So people, some things have happened in my life to bring up the subject of Hope.  Family struggles,  friends doubting themselves or life’s path, and me, struggling with some “Hope” issues of my own. 

 Hope is a very powerful thing.  It can get you thru each day when the days are filled with hardship, both emotionally and physically.  It is sometimes hard to find when the days are looking dark, you are feeling quite alone and you can’t seem to grasp any energy and picture your life in a positive light.   Here are some things that I do to turn that darkness into light.

 1)      Be still and thank the universe (This is the “God” of your faith).  Give thanks and gratitude for living, for this wonderful school of life, for this wonderful experience called “human,” flaws and all.  Truly think about all that is you, all that you have accomplished. If you feel like you have not accomplished anything, just look at the fact that you are a powerful, beautiful being.  One that has choices and control over what to create in this life.  Choice is truly a gift.  Being thankful and recognizing the gifts you have in your life, is the first step to Hope.

 2)      Get clear on what you “think” you need.  I only put it that way because sometimes what we think we need is so far from the truth.  State what this is in clear, concise sentences.  Even better to write it down because action has power and moves energy.  And always say, “I humbly request, this, or in your infinite wisdom, something better.”  This is because the universe knows exactly what we need, even though it doesn’t feel like it sometimes!

 3)      Ask the universe to provide direction for you.  Mother/Father God is very good at putting up sign posts and synchronicities in your life to point you in the right direction. It is up to us to recognize them and act.

 4)      Trust yourself when taking action…. Or no action.  I say this because sign posts and directions sometimes point to “wait.”  This can be really hard, especially for those of us who are used to action, action, and more action.  Yes, I am guilty of this, but I’ve come to realize the wisdom of doing nothing in certain situations.  No action is really an action, it is the action of wait till I receive better information, or wait because it looks like a current path is harmful to you or others.  And try not to confuse a “no action” feeling with fear of action.  This too is difficult, but if you really look at what actions are speaking to you, it should be obvious which ones are tied to fear.  Over coming that fear might be the right road.  Only you can get to the heart of that one.

 5)      One day at a time.  If you constantly look at your life in terms of past and future, you will set yourself up.  Now this is fine if your entire life has been bliss.  But hardship and pain has a way of latching onto us, living in our bodies and our souls, and cropping up as fear for future and present situations.  It’s called being Human!  Remember the past does not necessarily equal the future, and no one can predict the future.  NOW is the only way to live.  Don’t miss it by being depressed, fearful and preoccupied with “what if.” Take today for today, live life to the fullest, because TODAY is a sure thing.

 6)      Lastly, know that the universe and the energy that drives her, does not wish anything but love and the best for us. She wants us to be loved and to love…. to be creative and powerful beings, free to chose our destiny’s.  I know because I feel that love and supportive energy every day.  I see it in the beauty and balance of nature;  I see it the faces of children;  I see it when I experience a kind gesture from someone; I see it in the little miracles that happen when you least expect it.  

 Hope….. it is a blessed virtue, and I wish it for everyone so that they may find their own majesty, beauty and grace.  Love and Light, my beautiful people.  Till next time on this journey of discovery!

40s Goddess     Veronica Crystal Young                   www.tvartscapes.com         

Relax Already!

Relax Already!

So you would think that being in one of the most beautiful places on earth would make one relax, wind down and really take life slow, releasing all the tensions and problems one thinks is clogging up their life. Well, I’m here to tell you…. no! It’s not that easy for some of us.

There I was in Maui, at the beautiful Hyatt Hotel with stunning waterfalls, lagoons, and several pools right on the ocean, and it still was hard to just relax, sleep on a lounge chair or read a book, at least for an hour or two. I was still so anxious and in work mode, it was hard to “turn off” totally. I know it will take a few days…thank goodness I was there for a few days, at least I’ll be relaxed by the third day….I hope.

Does it take you some time to decompress? Do you get anxious or feel like you should be “doing” something to fill up the time? I, at least, have my videography and filming that makes me feel like I am not “wasting time.” And what is wasting time? Why do some of us feel that if we are not pursing our passions, working towards something or visiting family or friends that we are “wasting time?” I guess it comes from being a type A personality, where nothing is ever quite done, nothing is ever perfect. I have to sit down with myself and have a heart to heart talk, and give myself permission to relax. Permission to let time run out and watch it go by with absolutely no regret for not filling it with work, or calls or “business stuff.” I was going to be filming in a few days and that is my greatest joy, but until then, laying by the pool, sipping a pina colada and making new friends was just gonna have to do! It’s rough…..I know.

So give yourself permission to just be and enjoy time without feeling like you have to be somewhere, be doing anything or talking to anyone. Enjoy the “Being” and the rejuvenation will begin. You will have a fresh perspective on everything and you can actually start the process of learning how to “be” all the time, even when you are home, at work or in stressful situations. Teach yourself to take a moment to check into the “being” state. It is the Now, it is sacred, and it is necessary….for all of us.

Peace and love my friends. May you find the state of “being,’ relaxed and rejuvenated by life’s simple moments. They are life’s greatest moments.  Mahalo….

40s Goddess    Veronica Crystal Young

www.tvartscapes.com www.crystaleyesinc.com

 

Control

As I sit here on the beautiful island of Maui, I find myself thinking about Control. I have been going thru a control phase in my life, mostly because lately at work I have had to juggle a lot of information, people, personalities and projects, as well as assign tasks and manage a new team of analysts.   Control and extreme organization is a must and I find it is spilling over into my personal and home life.   Now this can be good and this can be bad.

The Good. I have organized and de-cluttered  my house.  I went thru the entire house picking up things that the neighborhood shelter or salvation army could use. A good friend of mine was great enough to build me some shelves in my home office and I finally can see and actually use my 3rd bathroom.  I have transformed it into my own personal “Spa” where I can pamper myself, take bubble baths , light candles and burn Eucalyptus oils while listening to the “Spa” channel on XM, and watching the ocean waves of Hawaii or a waterfall from Oregon. Ahhhh.   So feeling so out of control at work, I felt the need to have control over my home situation.   If the house or my office is a mess, It’s one more thing that I can’t get a handle on and I can be easily distracted. Walking into the clean, organized house, seeing everything in it’s place and just being able to unwind from the hectic day at the office is heaven, and has been my saving grace.

The Bad. At work, If I am not conscience of it, I can get really, really detailed and anal and drive everyone crazy, including myself I might add.  Trying to put processes and workflows in place and making sure everyone follows them for tracking and accountability purposes is just a real pain, but necessary to get the job done and keep juggling everything so we are on track. That’s the bad at work.  The bad in my personal life is a bit more complex.

When emotions run high, I sometimes lose perspective and I realize I really need to keep the control issue in check.  How do I do that? Well, first thing, I realize nothing is real anyway.  We make so much up.  The situation you are upset about, the guy you are wishing will call, the deal you are wishing would happen…….People, let it go!  Surrender. That’s all I can say.

You will drive yourself nuts trying to analyze everything.  We women are good at that one. Things will happen if they are suppose to happen, try to leave it to the Higher power. Try…it’s hard.  You have to believe whatever is best for you, mother/father/god will provide. Whatever you need in this life, whatever your challenges and lessons, you will overcome and learn.  I’m not saying don’t prepare, study, plan or engage in relationship, I’m just saying realize after you do the work, meet that special person, or present your deal, you need to let “life happen.”

What is your path?  What is your life’s passion?  Who is your life’s partner?  When will it reveal itself? When will he show up?  Will you miss it? Will you misread signs based on your wants and needs?  It all seems so complicated, but it really is not. Just surrender people.  Everything is as it should be. We have to believe that.  Being in this beautiful place called Maui at the moment, how can I not know and feel this as truth?  I do, and yes, it’s still hard.

We all have lessons to learn, and if we don’t learn them the first time, don’t worry, they will be back soon enough…another time, another place.  You can count on it.

Control.  Just Surrender.  It’s that simple…..and that hard.

Peace and love always,

40s Goddess    Veronica Crystal Young

www.tvartscapes.com www.crystaleyesinc.com

Friends

I can’t believe how fast this year has flown by.  Last year I was spending my holiday here in Sedona and here I am again, enjoying the red rocks, peace and serenity of mother nature.  I’m traveling a little further to the Grand Canyon in a few days so that will be a brand new adventure!  But I digress, I wanted to talk about Friends for the Holidays…. so here it is.

Friends…so great to have friends that you can talk to about anything without being judged, friends that you can trust to be there for you no matter what, friends that keep you real and won’t let you get away with being stupid or inappropriate. Friends who will keep your secrets in confidence and tell you like it is even though it may hurt.  It’s hard to find….. Having true friends is a treasure and we should never take it for granted.

Sometimes we may make mistakes, sometimes they will make mistakes, each of us acting less than our wonderful selves from pressures at home, at work…or just because we have some fear leading us in the wrong direction.  But owning up to our mistakes, taking responsibility for our actions and expressing any apologies needed is a start to getting things back on track. True friendship is golden and having true friends is the richest thing in the world.

I have groups of friends as we probably all do. Personal friends, work friends, comedy friends, professional-creative friends and a group of Goddess Friends.  There is some cross over but each group of friends is distinct and I can be a little different in each circle.  I know I am pretty quiet in the comedy group of friends as I’m a bit intimidated by all the wonderful talent!  I am very outspoken with my group of Goddess friends and personal friends, and the work and entertainment friend’s groups’ are a little more “political.”  Political meaning there are “correct” ways to act and interact.  I hate that but hey, that’s life right?  Honesty, integrity, fairness is the key to all interactions, no matter the group.  Trying to actually live that amongst all the personalities, political pulls and human nature is sometimes pretty challenging, especially when in a Management position. If I hold onto those 3 things, I’m doing good!

So I want to acknowledge a few groups of my friends.

Mary and Fred Willard’s Sketch comedy class friends – You inspire me.  You remind me not to take myself too seriously, and that there is joy and laughter in everything, even the tough times.

Cedars-Sinai Medical Center work friends – You inspire me.  You keep me grounded, fulfilled, and real….knowing that we are helping people and fellow staff……working thru some tough system hurdles together and figuring it all out, because that’s what we do!

Crystal Eyes Entertainment friends – You inspire me.  You give me such joy! You bring out the creative juices in me for “The Cougar News©” or “TV ArtScapes®.”  Thank you for sharing your talent and creativity.

Goddess friends – You inspire me.  You are my best friends, my chosen sisters. I feel loved and blessed to have you in my life. …thank you for being my family.

So who do you count as your friends?  Have you told them lately that you are happy and blessed to have them in your life?  The holidays are a perfect time for that.  So what are you waiting for?   It’s almost 2012!   (Ok, it’s only a movie!)

Lots O’Love people!

40s Goddess
VCYoung   – Veronica Crystal Young   AKA Gerlinde Davidson
www.tvartscapes.com www.crystaleyesinc.com

Regret

RegretAll I can say about this is Regret is such a negative emotion.  It also comes when we are not living in the present.  Regret can only live if we live in the past for how can you have regret for something in the future?  And if you regret something you did right now, as soon as you feel it, the time has past.  So let’s see what we can do about this emotion that can stifle, hurt and make you crazy!

Here is the textbook definition:  Regret is an intelligent and/or emotional dislike for personal past acts and behaviors. Regret is often felt when someone feels sadness, shame, embarrassment, depression, or guilt after committing an action or actions that the person later wishes that he or she had not done.

The reality is, if something is done, it’s done.  No amount of regret, sadness, depression…whatever you are feeling, (or should I say choose to feel), will change that fact.  I have three words to say consequences, communication and responsibility. My three favorite subjects!

Any and all action we take has a result (Consequence).  It is human nature to label these consequences as “good” or “bad” but I know I have to remember I am the one that labels this.  If I have what I consider a negative emotion based on some action I have had like sadness, depression, anger etc, I label the consequence “bad.”  When this happens, I have 3 choices.  1) Take some action to rectify the situation as you see it or 2) wallow in the bad feeling and hope it doesn’t last long (your choice) or 3)  Accept it, forgive yourself and move on. I suggest, as a rule, 1 or 3 because # 2 just builds walls and closes us off to people and experiences. Not a great way to live.

So, with that said, I confess I recently had been living in the “wallow.” I know, I know…take my own advice!  But sometimes it’s necessary to feel the hurt and pain of regret.  Maybe it will get you off your ass to do what you need to do, or feel you need to do!  I know it has me. I’m still working myself crazy at the hospital, but I am forcing myself to make time to do the projects, production and passion that feeds my soul.  We all have too….because Youth is in our Passions!   Hey, I think I just figured out my next segment!

So, be well my friends.  And always remember to live in the present, forgive the past, and go for your dreams. Life is too short!

Veronica Crystal Young – 40s Goddesss

www.tvartscapes.com www.crystaleyesinc.com

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Expectations

ExpectationSuch a big word that holds so much meaning.  Happy, sad, miserable, or ecstatic.  Our emotions and moods can run the gamut, depending on what our expectations are in any given situation. 

 

Just look at the “real” reason you are upset or happy in any given situation.  Are you feeling badly about yourself or a situation? That usually comes down to an expectation not realized, either with yourself or with someone else.  If you are ecstatic, was your expectation much less then the reality of the situation?   

 

Painful as it may be, when I dig deep to look at certain choices that I’ve made, it’s my own expectations that have hurt me.  Was my expectation too high? Was the reality of achieving the goal to crazy or impossible?  Was it that I had set up a meeting, call, or trip and my expectations fell short of the reality?  Did someone follow-thru with what I thought would happen or totally floor me with the opposite response, good or bad?  Remember the “good and “bad” is just your perception.  That’s a whole other topic!

 

I guess the most important thing to remember is that we have the control to choose our expectations. Just like it is in our control to deal with our perceived negative repercussions of expectations not realized.  We can either, except responsibility for our actions and for having X expectations about the circumstances; or we can blame outcomes on someone or something else which is really, I think, a cop-out. 

 

My question is…..Why would you want to act like a victim?  Like something was done to you? How disempowering is that? Granted, there are times when you don’t have any control over a situation but it’s all in your handling, your reaction to the outcome where the “gold” of who you are really is. Because, let’s face it, how we show up in the world, our actions, our non-actions……are all reflections of who we really are.  It’s our choice to show up and handle things in which ever way is our true self.

 

And one more thing….I feel we must find the capacity for forgiveness, forgiveness for others, as well as ourselves.  That’s a big one.  If you feel you made a mistake, if you were hurt by someone or you hurt someone and you continually beat yourself up for it, what good could possibly come from that?  Life is too short….GET OVER IT! 

 

So I guess the best thing to have is no expectations at all.  This is difficult to say the least.  If we are not attached to an outcome and just allow the “flow of life” to happen……we could be pleasantly surprised.  Besides, most expectations are based on past experience and we all know that old adage “the past does not equal the future…..”  Except when it does.  (Did I actually say that after all this?)  Ok, I need to let it go and get over it!

 

Blessings and Happy Wishes for the Coming Year!

 

40s Goddess    Veronica Crystal Young   

www.tvartscapes.com    www.crystaleyesinc.com 

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Time

As I sit here at my computer, beating myself up for not having time to write last week, I realize TIME is the perfect subject.  How often do you find there is not enough time in the day to accomplish what you want?  Are you as frustrated as I am when people say “time is an illusion?” How can it be an illusion when I miss a meeting, don’t finish something in time for a goal date or see that my face is showing the wisdom of my years?  To me it is very real, and it is crazy making sometimes when it feels like overwhelm before you even get started.  This Blog being one of those times!

 

I think the key to “feeling” like you have a handle on time is to live for and in the moment. There have been books and books written about this. One way I keep the “not enough time” hound away is to act.  Sure, I make my lists, I check things off, I get distracted, I make more lists…but action is always fulfilling in that it does bring me closer to goals.  Even if my action brings failure, at least I know the result, whether it is positive or negative, and that is valuable information.

 

I have come to allow my NOW to drive my time. Allow is big for me, being a goal oriented, over achieving, control gal (Couldn’t you tell!). Sometimes we just have to cut ourselves a break! 

 

My mantra every morning has turned out to be:  “Things will happen in their time.  People will show up in time, and you have enough time.” Just don’t go down that self destructive road of not enough……it’s a time killer! So until the next time….  Be kind to yourself.  Allow the now…….

 

Live, Love and find your “Time,”

 -VCYoung, 40’s Goddess     

www.tvartscapes.com   
www.crystaleyesinc.com